Toni Kuhn

Good Morning! It is 3 am and I am up writing this blog. People always ask me how I can get up so early to teach my 6 am classes. I live an hour away and wake up early enough to have some quiet time before my long day of teaching. I do this routine two days a week and yes, sometimes it is hard to get going in the morning. But I always feel more relaxed during the day if I take the time to enjoy the early morning hours. The extra time in the morning gives me a chance read articles, explore my teaching themes and helps me to stay focused throughout the day.

I love the solitude of the morning. It is very dark outside and the moonlight is shining in my living room. I can still hear the crickets singing and the sound of the gentle wind. There is something magical about being awake at this time. I feel more connected to world and to myself. As I drink my coffee I can feel my senses becoming clearer and I feel grateful for this special part of my day.

In a few hours I will teach my first class of the day. I love teaching yoga at this time. As I watch my students stumble into class with sleepy eyes, I know that their minds are still pure. This is the first experience of their day and stress has not woken up yet. It is a beautiful time to set an intention for the day. To connect to the Self and the world. To cultivate peace and harmony.

If you cannot make it to my 6 am yoga class, you can still wake up a little early each day to embrace morning hours. Maybe you start with an extra 15 minutes in the morning for some time by yourself. You could just sit for a minutes and take in the morning sounds, you could meditate or do a short yoga practice. Taking a few minutes for yourself before you begin your busy day will go a long way in helping you cope with the day’s events.

Here is a short yoga practice you could do to start your day.

Half Sun Salute– this will help you welcome the day.

Start in standing up in mountain pose.

Inhale reach the arms over head.

Exhale lower the arms and fold to the floor.

Inhale place your hands on your shins and come half way up.

Exhale fold back into the self.

Inhale press down with feet and come all the back up to standing.

Exhale bring your palms to heart.

repeat 5 times.

Reverse Warrior 2 & Triangle pose– these will help you stay grounded.

Start in a standing position and straddle your legs.

Bend your right knee and rotate your leg to the right.

Turn your left leg in a little.

Bend your right knee and keep your knee inline with your toes. Reach your right arm up and gaze at your finger tips..

Hold this Warrior 2 for a few breaths.

Straighten the right knee.

Shift your hips and reach to the right, then set your right arm next to your leg.

Hold this Triangle pose for a few breaths.

Come out of pose, turn your feet forward  into straddle position.

Begin the poses on your left leg.

After you finish Warrior 2 and Triangle on the left side, slowly bring your feet together and stand in Mountain pose.

Bring the palms together at the heart.

Bow your head a just breathe here for a few moments.

Set an intention for your day.

Have a beautiful   day!

Namaste.

During my yoga retreat last week we discussed the niyama saucha. Saucha translates to “cleanliness” or “purity” and helps us remember who we are at our core when we burn away distractions and obstacles. Thus allowing our energy to flow freely.

“As we purify ourselves from the heaviness and clutter of toxins, distractions and scatteredness, we gain clarity to meet each moment with integrity and freshness. We become more pure in our relationship with each moment”- Deborah Adele

When we clear away our clutter we begin to experience moments of supreme clarity. Moments where beauty stops us and makes us wonder. Moments when we are filled with so much overwhelming love that it brings tears to our eyes. Moments when we are completely content that we just ooze well-being from our pours. Moments when life pulses through us like an electrical current making us feel vibrant and young. Moments when our awareness is in technicolor.

Unfortunately, all of us carry “loads” that block our energy from flowing freely. These “loads” can be as complex as a past trauma or as simple as cleaning out your closet. The trick is to identify your “loads” and break free of them.

What are your loads?

Examples of loads that may be weighing you down:

• Body carrying toxins from poor diet
• Mind carrying the heavy baggage of victim-hood
• Mind carrying the heavy baggage of forgiveness
• Home & work-space full of clutter and junk

This work of clearing our clutter and letting go of our loads is a daily process. If you find yourself scattered or frazzled, take a moment to breathe and observe your surroundings. Is your area messy and full of clutter? Observe your thoughts in the moment. Are you stuck on replay of a past experience? Or are you stuck on fast forward trying to predict what’s next? Come back to the breath. Concentrate on the breath. Be in the moment breath by breath and your mind will slow down.

Namaste.

Yesterday, my dearest friend told me that her cancer is back. It is back with a vengeance and the situation is not good. She has been battling cancer for many years and this is the first time she said its bad. They took her off of work, which is like taking a life line away from her. She is a fitness instructor and loves to work out. This is a very scary time. She lives about 350 miles away and I feel so helpless. My friend is a devout Christian and has a lot of support from her church. I know they will be there for her along with her friends and family. But they are not me. I wish I could be there everyday holding her hand, making her laugh and doing gentle yoga with her. I know in time, I will be heading up there to be with her.

Today I was searching the web on ways to support my friend and I found this great article on the American Cancer Society website. Here are great tips on how to be a supportive friend during this trying time.  How To Be Friend To Someone With Cancer

Next Saturday is the Relay for Life in Santa Clarita. I am going to be there on stage with my colleagues from Total Women Gym. We will be doing the warm up to kick off the walk. If you can’t join the walk, you can make a donation on line at Relay For Life.

As I sit here closing out this this blog I am reminded that the best way I can support my friend is to live my life. She has always told me to keep living and do things that make me happy. The last thing she wants to be is a burden. So I am going to try my best to live my life, even if it means I do it through the tears that keep spilling over.

Here is the chorus from a new Lady Gaga song that I have been listening to. It is called “The Cure”.

You can listen to the song here.    The Cure

“I’ll fix you with my love
No matter what you know, I’ll
I’ll fix you with my love
And if you say you’re okay
I’m gonna heal you anyway
Promise I’ll always be there
Promise I’ll be the cure (be the cure)”

I am doing a special 90 minute cycle class at Total Women Gym on Tuesday May 9 at 8 am. This is to raise money for the Relay For Life. I am riding to support my dearest friend Kirsti with her fight. She is a true inspiration and a fierce warrior!
If you can’t join me but want to donate, you can drop a donation of at the gym or go to the Real For Life website.

Relay For Life

Sadly all of know someone who has cancer or has lost the battle. Here is a list of people I know who are still battling cancer. Some are in remission or still battling it, and some have sadly lost the battle.

SURVIVORS:

• Kirsti Contreras
• Dave Friedin
• Jackie Field
• Sue Ellen Hiatt
• Barbara Rosen

R.I.P:

• Ann Sticksel ( my friend Kirsti’s mom)
• Uncle Dan Ricigilano
• Richard Brown

Unfortunately, I know more people, but these are the people I am comfortable posting their names.

Lately, I have been spending a lot of my energy on fear. I am making big changes to my work schedule, and that is not only hard to do, but very scary to me. What if my students get upset? What if I do not like my new schedule? What if I lose clients? What if people get mad at me? ( I could go on and on). The truth about these changes that I have made is that they are for my health. The driving has not only been wearing me down, but it has also affected my shoulder. I have developed bursitis, tendinitis and early arthritis in my left shoulder. I know driving did not cause this, but it does not help it. In my quest to manage the pain, I have to let go of things that do not serve my body. So I gave up my classes on Mondays and now I only drive to SCV for work on Tuesdays and Thursdays.

I have been doing some deep soul searching and I kept asking myself why this decision took so long and why it was so difficult to make. I discovered that I was holding on to these classes “just in case”. Just in case, I was not making enough money. Just in case my private clients could not change their appointment date. Just in case I changed my mind. Just in case someone got mad at me for not teaching on Mondays. Just in case…..

Here is an article that my friend gave me. It explains the “just in case” dilemma.

From Bemorewithless.com

When we say “I’ll keep this just in case,” what we are really saying is …

“I’m not ready.”

“I’m afraid I’ll need this.”

“I’m afraid to let go.”

“I’m afraid I won’t have enough.”

For those of us decluttering and in search of more peace and simplicity, our problem has never been not having enough. Too much is our issue. Owning more, doing more, spending more and proving to everyone around us that we are more is weighing us down. It’s preventing us from figuring out who we are and how we want to live. It’s stopping us from doing work we love, spending time with people we love and helping those who don’t have enough.

Just in case doesn’t just apply to clutter and things in our homes. What else is going on in your life that you are holding on to out of fear? What are you holding on to because you aren’t ready, or because you are afraid to let go, or afraid you won’t have enough? When I began to let go of my just in case clutter, little pieces of fear went with it and it became easier to let go in other areas of my life.

Admitting that just in case means never allows us to stop procrastinating and invites us to let go and stop living in fear. When we say goodbye to just in case, we can start living and giving in more meaningful ways.

Today I am planning to tackle some of my closets and drawers to declutter my life. Maybe through letting go of things I do not need or use any more, I will feel lighter and more clear headed about my new schedule that starts tomorrow. Perhaps it won’t be so scary.  So what are you saving ‘Just in case’?

Namaste.

This week we began to study the “9 Basic Needs We Have to Meet to Feel Happy and Alive” By Sara Maude. The first in this series discusses our need for attention. Our need to be seen, recognized and to connect with others is vital to our happiness. In observing my own need for attention, I realized that my husband constantly reaches out to me to show me he sees me and values me. I usually go to sleep before him and every night before bed he comes in to tuck me in and kiss me goodnight. This is his way of giving me attention and taking special care of me. In turn, I feel cherished, loved and important. I do not take this for granted. I know that his gesture is something to be valued. I make sure to take notice of him and give him attention from me. A spontaneous hug during the day is a wonderful way to take notice of someone special in your life.

Everyone needs attention in one or another to feel happy. The key here, is POSITIVE attention. Kinds words, loving gestures and smiles go along way! Additionally, we must give ourselves the same kind of attention. Nurture and nourish ourselves so that we are able give attention and be able to receive it. Put the oxygen mask on yourself and then attend to others. This is as easy as spending a few minutes alone to recharge, take a yoga or fitness class, or meditating. Even just pausing during the day to observe your breath is a wonderful tool to nurture yourself.

Namaste.

The dictionary  defines Attention as:

1. Notice taken of someone or something; the regarding of someone or something as interesting or important. (Awareness, notice, observation, heed, regard, scrutiny, surveillance.
2. The action of dealing with or taking special care of someone or something. (Consideration, contemplation, deliberation, thought, study)

Here is Part one of the article.

1. The need for attention

We need quality attention from the people in our lives. More and more people in the world live alone. Unless your needs are being met elsewhere, a lack of attention can lead to low self-esteem, feelings of loneliness, and a lack of connection.

Join a meet up group, do an evening course, join a fitness group—anything that gets you out there and talking to like-minded people.

P.S. I have posted some new pictures in my gallery. Take a peek! Just click on the “Gallery” icon at the top of the page.

This is the final part of the “10 Things I’ve Let Go and How This Has Set Me Free ” by Sara Fabia. In this lesson we learned to let go of worrying about the future and to let go of pleasing others. Both of these were very profound for me. I took time to observe my thoughts and found that a lot of my suffering is the stories I create about the future and my insatiable need to please everyone. I discovered that I spend way too much time worrying about others peoples opinions, especially when it is about something in the future. My mind spins through endless scenarios  of the “what ifs?” and “what will they think?” that I end up worrying about the future and placing their needs before mine.

“You are not required to set yourself on fire to keep other people warm”- unknown

I have learned a lot about my behavior through these 10 steps. I know that the first steps are awareness and acceptance. From there I just try to stop my spinning thoughts and learn from observing myself. I practice gratitude everyday to keep me in the present moment. Day by day, moment by moment, breath by breath. I remind myself that I must set myself free from this suffering and that I am the only one who can stop these thoughts. I am the only one who has any control of my mind and heart. I am the only one that can truly set me free.

Namaste.

9. I’ve let go of worrying about the future.

I accept that there are things in life that I cannot control, no matter how hard I might try. Each time I find myself worrying, I keep telling myself “Time will tell.”

I might not always get what I want, but I know I always get what I need. I trust the flow of life, and choose to believe we live in an intelligent Universe, where everything unfolds perfectly. Sometimes in life, even the time needs time.

“Life is simple. Everything happens for you, not to you. Everything happens at exactly the right moment, neither too soon nor too late. You don’t have to like it…it’s just easier if you do.” ~Byron Katie

10.  I’ve let go of pleasing others.

I no longer seek external validation so that I can feel liked or accepted. Worrying about what others think is a waste of time. Other people’s opinion of me is all about them and what they see in me, filtered through their lenses; it has zero to do with me.

I’ve stopped expecting others to give me what I wasn’t giving myself: love, care, and attention. Loving myself as a whole—body, mind, and soul—is not selfish. I keep my cup full of self-love, and I take good care of my needs and my heart’s desires.

I have learned how to make powerful choices for my highest good without worrying about disappointing people. People disappoint themselves by setting expectations for who they want me to be or what they want me to do.

Saying no to things we don’t want to do is a learned practice and a sign of self-care. If it sounds like a “should,” I don’t do it. I go for the things that feel like a want. My wants come from myself, instead of being imposed on me by others. I always choose how I am spending my precious time and with whom. I know my time is my life, and it’s never coming back.

My life is about me and I have the right to make my own choices. Life is to be lived, not existed, and I choose to live it authentically, with no apologies and no regrets.

“Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won’t be the victim of needless suffering.” ~Don Miguel Ruiz